Insight of the Week: Coveting Energy vs “Energy Vampires”

Some of my clients ask me what the difference is between an “energy vampire” and “coveting”. First, these human behaviors have been around as long as humanity exists. They are nothing new. Quite simply, only the terminology describing these behaviors has changed reflective of the current generation.

Energy vampires are people who drain your emotional energy, either consciously or unconsciously. They could be friends, family members, partners, colleagues etc. They can leave you feeling any combination of: stressed, annoyed, drained, exhausted/fatigued, and overwhelmed. They possess a victim mentality and need to constantly be the center of attention. The psychological community has classified them into 6 categories.

Coveting occurs when you want what another person has as your own.  This could range from material items, physical attributes, lifestyle, personality attributes to even your very identity. Note, that admiring is not the same as coveting, as admiring is a positive energy that inspires you while coveting is a negative energy akin to stealing.

Coveting identity is when you siphon someone’s energy and present it as your own. As with energy vampires it too is bred from insecurity and wounds of “not being good enough,” feelings of unworthiness and/or feeling undeserving of Life’s blessings.  It is ego driven and often encompasses jealousy. When someone is coveting your identity/energy you will know it immediately for the outward signs will be self-evident. If called out they will act as if they are the ones being coveted and go on the attack to demean and degrade you to everyone. We see this run rife in New Age circles, and in everyday relationships, which is why it is imperative that we practice discernment at all times and in all situations.

In both cases, it is imperative to take your energy back by setting boundaries, creating space or removing yourself from the presence of these individuals and, if necessary, cut ties for the preservation of your emotional well-being. Remove their access to your Life.