We stay in relationships that don’t fulfill us, are toxic, or we have outgrown for many different reasons. Some examples are:
- Better the devil I know, than the devil I don’t know (Fear & Fear of Conflict)
- I’m too old, who wants to start over and do all that work ? (Comfort Zone)
- It’s not that bad; everyone has something (Rationalization & Habit)
- I need the money and security it provides (Co-dependency & Fear)
- The lifestyle is good – outweighs the relationship itself (Lack of Self-Worth, Low Self-Esteem)
- Don’t want to be alone (Fear of loneliness)
- What will family, friends, colleagues say (Fear of Rejection & Shame)
- Who will take care of me? (Emotional Dependency)
- They will change, I just have to stick it out (Delusional Thinking, Fear, Rationalization)
- My parents were the same and they survived (Lack of Awareness)
It is our own limited and conditioned beliefs that keep us locked into unhealthy relationships. Ask yourself what beliefs do I have about relationships? What was handed down to me from my family or culture? What relationships dynamics did I witness in early childhood? What do I really want and believe is possible? Bring your awareness to all these questions then assess your behaviors as to what you unconsciously implemented. Heal those wounds and the shift into a healthy relationship will happen naturally.
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